I broke down my show at Spark on Sunday afternoon and now, with it all said and done, I must ask myself it I'm totally happy with the way things went. Well, no. There are things that I would really like to change with the art that I produced, mostly I'd like to explore the new ideas that I developed while working on this body of work. I think that's a good thing, though. New ideas are what keep us engaged as artists, otherwise we become art making machines and our work has no soul.
I am also a bit unhappy with how stressful the entire situation was for me. I spent most of the time feeling uncomfortable being on display like I felt I was. Attention is good for an artist, right? But I'm really not very comfortable with attention...yeah, I'm a bit of a wall flower. I don't know how actors and musicians handle getting up on stage in front of a large group of people and, gulp, entertaining them for an hour or two. During the show I would watch my partner on the other side of the gallery confidently approach visitors to the gallery and walk them through every image she had up. Not me. Sure I would talk to people who seemed really interested, answer questions about technical aspects of my work, perhaps explore a few philosophical aspects of the work, but only if they really seemed interested. Is that bad? I guess I'm going to need to become a bit more gregarious if I am going to succeed as an artist...maybe?
The other important thing that I noticed during the show is that people would be drawn to Elaine's photographs and Robin's sculptures because they contained images that they could relate to. Not so much with my work. I need to evaluate if that's something that I want to change about my work...perhaps adding decals containing words or images, or do I want to remain true to non-representational work.
Finally, I worried a bit too much about who came and who did not. There were people that I would have liked to have been able to come to see the show, but I understand why they couldn't, and, while I missed them, I understand. There were also a lot of wonderful friend who did make the trip out to the gallery, especially for the opening reception, and I really appreciate it!
So, yes. Measure once, cut twice...still too short. Yes, I do sometimes wish things could have gone differently, but at least I have the experience. All that's left to do is try again. I just need to get my goals figured out and then set my course again and try and attain them. (Or, as Yoda says, "Do or do not. There is no try.") And even if I did miss the mark on a few things, maybe I wasn't as far off as I might have thought?
Thanks again to everyone who came out to the show! If you missed it, you can see pictures on my Emerge page.